its getting real crappy now

well this is fun...... i possibly have borderline personality disorder.  not good, i am selfharming again, burning my arm with cigerettes, things not going good with my boyfriend, who iu live with, but dnt wanna live with, some of my friends are real worried about me, one of whome knows so much about me, and is always there for me, he is awsume, we did coke together the other night, i am drinking more, doing more drugs, [the drug thing is no biggie, it avereges out at  half a gram a month of coke, and countless amounts of weed] i am contemplating suicide  again, and i have just lost my motivation for anything. so basically things are going shit.

fucked up awsume nights

coke weed alcohol and party, its all good, until the come down in the morning....